Sitting in your comfortable plaid chair with your legs propped up on the arm of the couch.
Mumbling the unspoken words that will never find there way to the ear of the coming.
The bottle of scotch you clench between your finger tips slowly disperses throughout your veins.
You usually never allow yourself to smoke inside the home but tonight, oh tonight is different. It's worth it.
The dark of the night crept onto you like a cloud surrounding the beach.
Your two open eyes keep the ghosts at bay.
Sitting directly in front of the door, still mumbling, still chain smoking.
You go over possible accidental deaths that could have occurred on her way home.
Shaking your head, you search the watch on your left wrist, feeling your forehead.
You convince yourself that you are not tired.
Where is she? Why has she not come home? You ask yourself.
The insecure rage stumbles out of your mind into the real world, coming in the form of a bottle thrown across the room.
Shattering glass explodes ten feet away on the wall with the picture of you two at the carnival.
The photograph drops to the ground with the shattered bottle and breaks as well.
You sigh to yourself and nod your head in justice for a quick minute.
Knowing that your little episode didn't do a single thing other than make a mess for you to clean up.
Your conscience, your oh so wise conscience lets you know that she is most definitely with another man.
You try and contain your anger with deep breaths while closing your eyes.
You picture the kind of man she might be cheating with.
This is overtaking your entire body, tearing you apart.
Still sitting in front of the door borderline crying.
Knock, knock, knock...
Finally! You exclaim.
You fly out of the chair, adjust your shirt to look presentable and be glorious in your triumphant discovery.
Swinging the door open with a smart smile almost like catching a little kid stealing candy.
"Eh-mm" clearing your throat.
Your eyes meet a stranger.
Words pour out of your mouth saying, "Hello officer"
"Mr. Helsmer" The officer says.
"Yes, how can I help you" firing back.
"Your wife died in a car crash tonight" as he grabs your shoulder.
Puzzled and loss of breath consumes you.
You feel like a fool.
You ask "How did it happen?"
He responds with "She was hit by a drunk driver on her way home from visiting her mother in the hospital."
Now you know your a fool.
You thought a whole story of cheats and lies up in your head not even realizing that she could have been doing something innocent.
You didn't even have a chance to say one last "I Love You" to her.
Her last moments on this earth and you were busy turning red like fire.
Content which you weren't.
Jealousy that overwhelmed you, never helped you in any way.
At least you gained something from obsessing over it...
